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Desperate to curb crime before World Cup, ANC considers EXTREME measure.


As South Africa deteriorates further, the ANC is considering an extreme measure to stem the tide before the World Cup starts.

An anti-rape device that the woman wears in her vagina. The device may soon be available in South African store, but the ANC is considering a proposal by a doctor to give away 30,000 of them for free in Cape Town.

The idea is that the device attaches to the rapist’s penis and must be removed by a doctor.

Ironically, the president of South Africa is a confessed rapist. ANC member Jacob Zuma was on trial for raping an HIV+ woman shortly before becoming president. Zuma admitted the rape, but said it would have been “ungentlemanly not to rape the woman.” Zuma testified that the woman was wearing her skirt in a way that meant she wanted sex. When asked if he knew the woman was HIV+, Zuma said yes, but stated he was not worried because he took a shower after sex.

A mob led by spokesmen for the ANC youth league and the South African Communist Party Youth league formed outside the court. They threatened to publicly lynch any of the three member panel of judges who voted to convict Zuma. The judges dismissed him and a Dutch charity rushed the woman to safety in a foreign country.